My St Patty's Day Limerick

Let’s be honest, St Patrick’s Day is the best day of the entire year. In commemoration of the big day, I’ve decided to try my hand at writing a limerick. I am by no means a poet so I can imagine that aesthetically it leaves a bit to be desired. And I’m a sucker for puns and bad wordplay, so you’ll have to deal with that. But what the hell, check it out.

St Patty’s Day’s upon us again
Sometimes I wonder how long it has been
Since amateurs lied
‘Bout being Irish and tried
To drink like the Irishmen can

They say that we’re in a recession
The news sure won’t let you forget it
But a glass with no beer
Deserves a few tears
For that is the Greatest Depression

The market’s been up in the last week
We all owe O'bama for this feat
But I need new doors
And new tile floors
Maybe he’ll earmark them for me

Slumdog cleaned up at the Oscars
Lil’ Wayne’s trying to be a rocker
And Idol’s new judge
Makes Paula so ug’
That even Ron Jeremy wouldn’t rock her

ARod admitted that he was on juice
A lot of fans considered it old news
But if New Yorkers thought he stayed clean
After two thousand and three
Then I have some Citi stock to sell you’s

We’re all trusting the big government brass
That success of the bailout will come to pass
But if Jamie Kennedy can do it
To pull Jennifer Love Hewitt
Then the sun even shines on a dog’s ass


Happy St Patty’s Day, lads!