OMG, Facebook Me!

Let’s be honest, your future employer should be allowed to view your Facebook or MySpace page. These are public domains after all, so if you’re embarrassed or ashamed of something, it shouldn’t be there in the first place. Companies have a right to know about the people they are going to invest in, so it seems to me like a necessary part of due diligence.

I don’t even quite understand why people think Facebook and MySpace are private. Especially since Facebook is now open to any user. There are very few things about the internet that can be deemed “private,” I mean it’s not called the World Wide Web for nothing. The goal of the internet is to make information more accessible, and certain sites like Facebook and MySpace have increased that accessibility exponentially. I don’t think people realize how small Facebook is, either. In order to access someone’s profile (by the default settings) you only have to belong to their geographical network. How hard is it to change your hometown to access someone’s network and therefore someone’s information? The answer is “not very.” Unfortunately for young kids today, their parents are going to be just as tech-savvy as they are, so trying to block parents is a problem with a likely easy solution.

I think the biggest complaint people have against this is that their private life is not their employers’ business. Well we’ve already established that the internet is public domain, not private. But companies also have a right to know what they are investing in. Ok, so maybe this doesn’t apply if you work the graveyard shift at Denny’s. In that case, Denny’s has a right to check your police record. But if a company is going to invest $40, $60, $80, or $100G’s, it has a right to find out about the investment. Would a company buy or lease a piece of equipment without doing any research? And they don’t want to just see the manufacturer’s description, they want to read the user reviews and hear from other users how the equipment performed. You might say, “That’s what references are for.” How often have you listed a reference that would talk negatively about you? Don’t you think those are a little biased? You want to know what people are all about? Look at their Facebook and MySpace pages.

I think this holds true especially for companies that take pride in their employees. Some companies could care less, obviously. But in a company where employees represent the brand, those employees should be screened and held to a higher standard. If I’m that employer, I want to know if my employees have marijuana leaves plastered all over their MySpace page. I want to know if my employees still go out and get trashed several times per week. I want to know if my employees are going to put themselves in a position that not only reflects poorly for my company but affects productivity. I pay you $80G’s a year? Act like it. Make me think I made a good decision. Hiring decisions shouldn’t be based on Facebook pages, but the pages should be available as a reference should employers decide to use them.

To me, this is fairly black and white. If you want to be an ass, be an ass. Just be aware that everyone is watching.

Obama Nation

Let's be honest, as of November 4th, 2008, the United States officially became an Obama nation. I really couldn't tell though, because his supporters are the type that really like to fly under the radar. None of them are terribly obnoxious or over-the-top, and they've been pretty unoriginal in celebrating and commerating. In spite of this, I've been able to put together a list of a few collectors items I've spotted that are available in case you want to pick one up to remember this point in our history.

After doing one search on Google and one on eBay, this is what I came across (I also threw in some decoys that I made up, see if you can spot them):

Collectible coin set

Folk art (familiar art pieces w/Obama inserted)

One of a kind art (originally made pieces)

Poster

Obama logo Air Force Ones

Obama logo hat

Obama 8 inch doll

Bobblehead doll

Finger puppet doll

Dancing Obama doll

Paper doll

Throw blanket

Hand-crafted quilt

Inauguration DVD (pre-order)

Campaign trail DVD

Subway fare card

Comic book

Pin collection

Pin and brooch

Christmas ornament

Laser-etched marble picture

Wall calendar

Stuffed bear

Magnet collection

Water bottle

Stainless steel bottle

Mug

Collectible model jet with Obama logo

Baby onesie

Boxer shorts

Briefs

Thongs

Trinket box

Sew-on patch

Bookmarks

Earrings

Grateful Dead shirts (Deadheads for Obama)

"Time for Change" wristwatch

Mousepad

Business card holder

Limited edition pen

Mavericks presidential ale bottle

Charm bracelet

Porcelin plate



Like I said, that is the result of ONE Google search and ONE eBay search. Were you able to spot the ones in the list I made up? Well, I lied. I didn't make anything up. Every one of those items is legit. Perhaps this is what Barack meant when he talked about creating new jobs. I mean, somebody has to produce all this stuff, right?

I also did a quick search on the celebrities that will be attending the Inauguration festivities: Secretary of State Oprah Winfrey, Bruce Springsteen, U2, Beyonce, Usher, Garth Brooks, Stevie Wonder, John Mellencamp, Shakira, Mary J. Blige, Herbie Hancock, Josh Groban, John Legend, James Taylor, Denzel Washington, Jamie Foxx, Martin Luther King III and Queen Latifah. These are usually people I equate with the term "blue collar", so they're all logical choices.

I don't even think I need to interject an opinion here, all of this nonsense speaks for itself. Pretty high expectations to live up to, no?

That's What Friends Aren't For

Let’s be honest, we all have bad friends we hang onto for much too long. For one reason or another, we let these people hang around and continue to affect our lives in a mostly negative way. They drain us and drag us down, and in the end we’d probably be better suited moving forward in separate directions.

If you think about it, we probably only actually choose a couple of our friends. It may sound funny, but think about it. When you’re young, you often become friends with the neighbors or the kids in the neighborhood that around your age (not your choice). If your parents have friends around the same age, you have “play dates” and those kids become your friends (again, not your choice). You sign up for sports and recreational activities and you meet friends that way (only partly your choice because of who else signs up). In middle school you may branch out and meet other kids that sit by you alphabetically (not your choice), but you probably already know some kids from the neighborhood and recreation. As you get older you start to choose your friends, but if they’re not from a previous association or by a group you’re in, it’s by “social status.” You recognize your self-perceived level of “cool” and find others in the same caste. Then when you go away to college, what happens? You start back at Square 1 and become friends with the roommate(s) to whom you’ve been assigned (not your choice). Moving on, you become friends with people on your team at work, with other married couples when you get hitched, and with other parents of the same age as your children. It’s a bit exhaustive, but you get the point—how many of these friendships are 1) genuine and 2) of your specific choosing?

This is probably the reason that after a lifetime of human interaction, we end up with about 4-5 really good friends. And we take pride in those 4-5 because we’ve chosen them among many and they are reflections of who we are. If a friend is recognized for something positive, we feel proud to be associated with him/her. But as I’ve pointed out, our 4-5 good friends represent maybe 10% or less of all the friends we’ve had, meaning that when we make a new friend there’s a 90% failure rate. So we shouldn’t be surprised when friends turn sour on us, but we are because our friends are an extension of us. We share experiences, stories, secrets, and essentially give ourselves to each other.

There will be times when friends need to lean on each other—it’s what friends are for. They’re there when times are tough and also when the good times are rolling. But I’ll bet that we all have a “friend” who now only comes around when it’s convenient for him/her. Or when he/she needs something. Of course people and priorities change—I’d be naïve to think they didn’t—but when fundamentals and values change, it shifts the entire scale. And because these people are our good friends, we keep thinking one day they are going to turn the corner. But they don’t. In fact, they’ve already turned the corner, just not the way we wanted. We end up obsessing about these people and wasting countless amounts of energy stressing about what they have (or haven’t) done. It affects our mood and then affects the mood of those around us. The bold approach is to have a conversation with them about it because I feel it’s our responsibility to bring people back down to earth and tell them when they’re acting out of character. Unfortunately, enough is usually said through actions that whatever will be said in conversation has already been implied. The only thing to do is to cut it off—say “No” to drama. Move on. People come and go, and if they’re really good friends, it will work out in the end.

As we get older and busier—be it with work, spouses, exercising, whatever—our time becomes more sparing and valuable. Why spend any of that time on people who aren’t worth it?

What Not To Wear

Let’s be honest, clothes make the man and appearance matters no matter how much you may want to deny it. Personality, intelligence, and wit can get you so far, but at the end of the day you have to look the part. Don’t confuse looks with appearance, either—the two are distinctly different. This doesn’t make us shallow as a society or culture; it makes us better.

I used to be of the opposing view. Who cares what I look like? My friends like me for me and accept me for my unique style. Mismatching makes me eclectic—I can mix colors, patterns, or plain not give a damn. And you know what? There’s a time and place for all of that—it’s called high school. Probably even be able to get away with it in college. Speaking from my own experience, I first attended an all boy private high school; an institution where you may think it’d be hard to screw up a wardrobe if there’s a dress code. Wrong. Since there were no girls, nobody cared what he looked like. Hardly anyone knew what a comb was, we had “Ugliest Tie” competitions in class, and just because you had to wear a button-down shirt, Dockers, and a tie, it didn’t mean you had to wear them well. No lie, there was a kid who went to bed in his clothes so he could sleep an extra 30-40 minutes and literally roll out onto the bus. There were kids who wore the same clothes every day for weeks at a time. Who was there to impress?

A public co-ed high school seems to operate a little differently, you know, with the presence of girls and all. You start seeing some button-down shirts and everyone wears jeans, but there is still a large percentage who wears what is comfortable—tee shirts, sweatshirts, gym shorts, etc. You also see a lot of awkward-looking teens trying to dress older than they are. Girls with no clue how use lipstick come to school looking Miss Piggy after a bumpy train ride. But since nobody knows any better than anyone else, everyone can afford to make mistakes.

Then it seems like we regress in college. Sweatpants and hoodies become common classroom attire and no one flinches. The nightlife forces some to upgrade their wardrobes to include club-wear, but unless you’re with someone who knows what he/she is doing, you walk into the store and have no idea what to buy. What you think looks good is a warped impression formed over the last 10 years of mismatching and wearing sweats. The turning point, at least for guys, is getting a girlfriend (I can’t take credit for this theory/realization, but it is true). Look at the difference in wardrobe of college guys with girlfriends, and college guys who are single (and straight—let’s be honest, gay guys are inherently better dressers). Most girls have an inane fashion sense, but more importantly they care enough about the appearance of the guys they are seen with to say something.

So at least now we have an idea of where all of this stems from. If a terrible wardrobe outlasted high school and college and has carried over to the real world, it’s time for an intervention. Pick up a magazine or two. Turn on the television and see what good looking people are wearing (NOT MTV). If you stand out in a crowd, and not in a good way, your friends are embarrassed by you. You are a bright red pair of clown shoes. No one can take you seriously and you are here for entertainment purposes only. Unfortunately, your friends often don’t have the heart to tell you this. If you are over the age of 25, you should stop shopping at Abercrombie and Fitch. Might want to cut out American Eagle and Aeropostale, too. Those clothes are intended for high school and college kids, and people above this age range trying to look younger actually look older when they put these on. Unless of course you’re 25 and still get carded at the horse race track. If you look like a slob, you are unapproachable. It’s probably harder for you to find dates, jobs, or even friends. Dressing well shows that you have respect for your own self and for your colleagues and friends. If you think nice clothes are too expensive, consider them investments. You’ll get more use out of a really nice pair of pants than a DVD collection you’ll watch once. If it takes a little more effort to find clothes that fit perfectly and are appropriate, then so be it—it will be much more rewarding in the end.

This isn’t a call-to-action to rush out and buy skinny jeans or sweater hoodies, but please, do us a favor and step up your clothing game. Le Coq Sportif’s look much better with jeans than do clown shoes.